i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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