you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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