Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I can't trust your balls anymore.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
