But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
