using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.