turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
