their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I just gift wrapped bread.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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