lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
