i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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