Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
