6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
