Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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