So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
