Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
whose parrot is this?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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