Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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