On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize