I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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