Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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