it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
