I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
