I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
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