Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Randomize
