Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
We need a shit load of segways right now
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
