this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
