Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
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Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
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Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...