trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize