Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are your genitals available?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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