Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
