Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize