After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Help. Why am I so naked?
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