She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
