Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
