I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
This house was built for laser tag.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
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