Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
