and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
