My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Randomize
