Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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