Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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