Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I didn't notice because vodka
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
