Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
