So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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