pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
