Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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