We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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