dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
