I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I would fuck him just for his dog
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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