We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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