I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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