Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
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