So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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