Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize