Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
