i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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