Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
